That's the news and we are outta here...

Later today we'll start our trek home. This part of our journey is over. We are eager to start the next leg of our journey together as a complete family, me, Dawn, Grace and Olivia. We're not sure where life's path will take us but we know it will be the four of us together making the trip.

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China has been wonderful and has given us a blessing and a precious gift in Olivia. Although this land is foreign to us it will always be part of our family. I hope one day we will come back to visit, when Olivia is old enough to understand.

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Overall the people here have been kind, patient and friendly. Their customs and way of life can be very different at times (notice the women with swords or the playground equipment designed to be adult exercise equipment). They have been far more patient with our inability to speak Chinese than Americans are to folks who don't speak English. The old and young are the most fun of all. Both curious and friendly. Wishing us well and thanking us for giving this child a future.

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So from the Corleys we say thank you and we love you to all of our friends and family and to China we say goodbye, for now, and thank you for letting us have our dream.

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(Old guy wearing an ipod, dancing on the river bank)

First steps towards citizenship

Today we headed to the US Consulate for the babies' US visas. We were prepared for a long wait but it turned out they were able to process us very quickly. All children adopted from China headed for the US process through this same room. The gentleman from the consulate was quite nice and chatted with us for a few minutes and updated us on some US news before swearing us in.

(Livvie likes baths now)

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After the swearing in ceremony we were handed sealed brown envelopes and told not to open them and bring them with us to the US immigration official. This made a little leery. The last time I was handed an sealed brown envelope and told not to look inside was by a guy named Momo in Newark. But he paid me $200, the guy at the consulate didn't give me a dime.

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We have been eagerly awaiting Livvie's first steps. Well, it happened today Livvie promptly took her first steps all by herself in the US Consulate after being sworn in.

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We begin our journey back to Grand Junction tomorrow evening, we will leave China at 9pm, arrive in L.A., spend the night and continue on home on the 1st. Once we land in L.A. and they stamp Livvie's passport and visa she immediately becomes a US citizen. The Statue of Liberty's torch burns a little brighter to welcome you home Liv.

Life in the big city

Today we had a day off from all of the official business, so we spent a couple of hours walking around the city of Guang Zhou. Tomorrow is our final appointment at the US Consulate.

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For those of you paying attention the internal GPS was dead on, we found the grocery store right where I thought it was. There are tons of electronics stores around. If you need an MP3 player just let us know. I bought Dawn the smallest Bluetooth headset I ever saw (Nokia) for $10 US. Wait 'til you see the next generation of cell phones, they are so small I couldn't dial them with my ham hands.
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We visited a park that had some lovely flower displays and this Mickey Wannabe. It's so bad I don't think the Disney folks would even be pissed off (looks kinda like the mouse from the original Steamboat Willie animation, for the Mickey Mouse buffs out there).

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The girls took a much needed nap. I used the time to have a Guinness on the banks of the Pearl River and enjoy the afternoon sun with a book. It's the most relaxed I have felt during the entire trip. I'm reading some Christopher Moore books, for anyone who has read him they know how completely out of his mind he is. Right up my alley.

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Later we joined our new friends Tom, Elizabeth and baby Molly for dinner. They are from Florida by way of Mass. (it annoys me that people mix up our accents, Boston accents sound nothing like NJ accents to me, anyway...) Elizabeth is the sister of our friend in Fruita, Paula (who has adopted 2 beautiful kids from Korea, Tess and Jack). Six degrees....

They are very nice folks. Tom whines incessantly though..."I'm cold"..."I'm sick"..."I need a fork"..."Elizabeth picks on me" ..."I want a camera just like Jim's" and on and on. (Just kidding, I know he'll read this and give me crap. He's really a good guy. You'd be hard pressed to find a guy that loves kids more than him. ) I'm glad we met them. It makes the trip much more fun connecting with someone like them.

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We are already planning on going to see them in Florida to take the girls on their first trip to Disney World. One of the most enjoyable moments in my career as a Dad was taking Grace to Disney World, holding her in my arms at the base of Main St., USA, whispering into her ear, "you know, Cinderella's castle really does exist" and seeing the look on her face when I spun her around and showed it to her. And I'll get to do it again with Livvie. Boy, this dad stuff is fun.

Cosmo Kramer's City River Swim Club & the internal GPS

On the Peal River on the edge of Shamain Island every morning there is a group of men who swim in the Pearl River. It's in the high 40's/low 50's in the morning's here. Are these guys nuts or really big Seinfeld fans?

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As I continue my walk I set out to find a supermarket for Dawn. I recall seeing one while on the bus yesterday. I have to rely on my internal GPS and landmarks. When you can't read a single sign, not even recognize a character of the alphabet a good sense of direction in necessary. Hardwired into my melon thanks to one too many Boy Scout camping trips and Klondike Derbies is my internal GPS. I always seem to know which way to go and can find my way back to a place after travelling the route just once. Anyone making a trip to a country like this I would highly suggest working on your sense of direction first.

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I seemed to find my way safely off of the island (apparently a bit of a challenge for he rest of our group) and to the street where I saw the supermarket but I can't find the store. I think because the steel gates are down on all of the shops, it makes them look different. We'll see how good I am when I head back later with Dawn and Liv after everything opens....I'll let you know.

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Oh, one bit of panic with the baby. Dawn left the room and I put the baby on the floor. A few seconds later I noticed her looking at me, mouth open looking like she was going to scream her head off. Nothing came out. Sometimes a baby is so upset that there is a delay after the face is made before the sreaming comes. So I wait, still no sound, no air. She's choking. I reach down and scoop her up so all of her weight is on her belly pressed to my hand. I begin to flip her over into the position to try to dislodge the blockage for a baby. And pop, something flies out and lands on the floor and I hear crying. Whew....she's pissed but OK. I flop onto the chair and think, " I just want to be home".

Livvie goes to the zoo

As we board the bus I look at the faces of the babies, something looks different. It takes a few moments to realize they look calmer, visibly more relaxed. The blank stares and furrowed brows are all gone. These kids are settling in with their new families.

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At first it felt awkward calling the baby Olivia, Liv or Livvie. I can't really explain it. I would look at her and just not think that name. It wasn't that I was detached, I was attached to her and absolutely in love with her before I ever held her. Today I felt that awkward feeling had slipped away. Calling her by her name feels comfortable now. I like to call her "Liv", it fits her well. Now that she is out of that orphanage she will get to live.

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Another thing I notice, at this stage of the game the rookies in the bunch stand out. You can see the veterans moms handling the babies with ease while the rookies stumble and have difficulty soothing their babies when they cry. This trip is hard enough, I can't imagine trying to figure out how a baby works too. It would be like trying to drive a car for the first time at the Indy 500. In the back of my mind I begin to hope that I am surrounded by the seasoned, battle tested moms on the flight home. I know it's mean but it is a 13 hour flight...it's every man (or baby) for themselves.

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We visit the Xiangjiang Safari Park. This place is huge, and empty. I mean EMPTY! At one point we walked for over an hour without seeing another park visitor. It began to feel like we walked into some post-apocalyptic horror film. I was waiting for the zombies to crawl out of the bushes and try to eat our brains. Either that or the park workers were capturing the American tourists and feeding them to the tigers because park revenues were down and they could no longer afford fresh meat.

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I manage to nap on the bus until one of the rookie mom's babies does a full on freak out. Hours of blood curdling screams from the seat in front of me... OK more like 20 minutes but it felt like hours. Maybe Dawn should teach a rookie mom class.

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We went to dinner at a local place called Lucy's that caters to Americans. It's decorated with American memorabilia. There is even a New Jersey license plate on the wall, very comforting. It's becoming apparent that Livvie is becoming an American girl before we ever get home. See she's enjoying and PB&J and some french fries......does it get any more American than that?

Git-r-done

The princess has her bottle. Not a bad life, not any more!

Thomas Edison once said "Hell, there are no rules here - we're trying to accomplish something." I don't think old Tom ever adopted a little girl from China. To accomplish this there are lots of rules to contend with. They come at you from two countries! Today we had the joy of working with both governments. If you are ever so inclined to do this be sure to pack some extra patience and sense of humor....you're gonna need it. Remember it's all about turning these little, forgotten girls into the princesses they deserve to be.
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We started the day getting Visa photos for the US Consulate, apparently the photos we took for the Chinese government 4 days ago are not good enough. Then a few blocks over for the agency's traditional group photo by the waterfall. Here is a line up of the usual suspects. baby number three, step forward and say, "ma ma". Baby number six turn to the right. Baby number five did it .....she's the one that flung eggs at me..... arrest her! (no, we didn't pay extra for the best looking baby...but thanks for asking)
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Anyway, on from there to the medical center for the babies' check-ups for the exit paperwork. This place is packed like Penn Station at Friday, 5pm before a holiday weekend. We have three doctors to visit, families from other agencies are pouring into the exam area. I'm not sure these docs would notice someone trying to adopt a cadaver but it's their world and I'm just a squirrel trying to get a nut!. Never having found I line I wouldn't circumnavigate (hey Mom, see the $500 you spent on my SAT prep class didn't go to waste.) I see Dawn and Livvie on one line and I jump in line at another station. Nice move we are out in only 40 minutes or so.
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Later we gather in the hotel conference room, sans babies... well at least ones under 3 ft tall, to work on a stack of US government forms. One form is actually several editions old and it has two questions labeled #25, how do you update a form several times and not see that?...... But dammit you know they will kick the form out if the date isn't formatted right. Which, by-the-way, asks for the date to be formatted five different ways throughout this stack of US Gov't issued forms....I kid you not, I counted. I didn't know there were that many ways to format a date....OK so I use Excel, I knew there were that many ways, but you get my point, I'm on a tear here don't slow me down.
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If I have to write my address one more time I'm going to snap, jump up on a desk and scribble it on some poor bureaucrats forehead with a Sharpie. Oohh and the questions from the peanut gallery...what's a surname? What does it mean when they ask where were you married? Do they want my street address? It says put your phone number, should I put my phone number too? AARRGH the vein in my forehead begins to throb, my head aches. I love my daughter, I love my daughter, I love my daughter I chant to myself... I calm down, then I hear, "I don't know my hotel room number" ( a question asked a few times on the forms). My eye is now twitching, every fiber of my being wants to scream at the top of my lungs, "I DIDN'T SEE YOU SLEEPING IN THE HALLWAY! SO HOW ON GOD'S GREEN EARTH DO YOU MANAGE TO FIND YOUR BED EVERY NIGHT? YOU TWIT!!" (OK, I wasn't really thinking "twit" but I'm trying to keep it PG rated here)Where is that Buddhist monk when I need him or a nice morphine drip?
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Two hours later, broken and weary I stumble back to my room, because, you see, even in my eye twitching, vein throbbing, weakened state... I REMEMBER MY STINKIN' ROOM NUMBER!! Now I have 30 minutes to get ready for a group dinner, my eye begins to twitch again at the very thought.

Thanks for listening.......I feel much better now. ...see you tomorrow.
Honey, where did you pack the heavy narcotics?

Buddah's Blessing

We have left the Hunan province for the Ghuangdong province, a city name Ghuang Zhaou to be exact, about one hour north of Hong Kong. We are on a small island in the city called Shamian Island. It's a small oasis of Western culture that houses many of the adoptive families while they process paperwork through the US consulate, as we will over the next few days. The buildings are tightly clustered with a British influence. There are many other American families, American food, people speak English. Shops cater to the adoptive families. It's very comforting to us all.


We did some shopping and sightseeing. We visited a Buddhist temple where a Buddhist monk performed a blessing ceremony on the adoptive families and children. We enjoy learning about the culture that brought us this little girl very much.


We did well on the shopping, I resumed the negotiating reigns with my usual skill and got us some tremendous deals. After dinner we visited a shop and I let Dawn practice some haggling on some small items. With some coaching from the master she did quite well.


Olivia is doing wonderfully. She has really opened up. The Hunan province is famous for its spicy food and they say girls from Hunan are spicy too. Liv is a spicy little Hunan girl. She is no longer shy, she does her very best to let you know what she wants. She loves to smile, laugh and chat away. And very curious, without fear, like Grace at this age. I have to hold on tight near an open window as she will try to pull herself closer to see out. She squirms all over her stroller to get a better view.





She likes to ride on my shoulders and use my ears as handlebars. Every now and then she leans around to look me in the face and smile. Mommy has taught her to use my head as a bongo drum. Her tickle spot is on her side below her ribs. If I growl and nibble her there she treats me with squeals and giggles.















She is an absolute joy to be around. She lights up a room and puts a smile on a stranger's face, just like her sister can. It's going to be fun being her daddy. I am a very fortunate man to have these girls in my life.

Saturday morning's stream of consciousness

I don't expect this to make sense to anyone, but me...

Well "Dance Party P.R.C." has already begun as I start my morning walk. Who needs a gym membership when you have some concrete and some music. Freestyle and ballroom dancing is on the bill. Next to it is a badminton tournament and aerobics class. Today's forecast is smoggy sun in the low 40's to mid 50's. Visibility is good at 3 blocks.



I walk thru a construction site, the men working around me are wearing hard hats, should I be concerned? No need to worry, I am now walking under scaffolding, the bamboo above me should protect me from a cinder block reaching terminal velocity from the 23rd floor. An OSHA rep would bust a blood vessel if he saw this.



Formerly the last holdout in the group, I am tired. I miss Grace. This is an exhausting trip, mostly emotionally. This unfamiliar place makes it more difficult. There is a gas mask in the hotel closet, just one? If anything happens I guess I'll see you on the other side. Can't communicate, can't read. The underground passages used to navigate large intersections are disorientating, this way seems right, ooo a street vendor selling knock offs... I point at the DVD of "Die Hard", English? I ask....duh, it's a bootleg I doubt they dubbed it before they stole it. The urban surroundings are somewhat familiar but so, so different. Not like home in Colorado but my first home, making me two kinds of homesick.



Even the jaded urbanite citizens of Changsha still find me a curiosity. They try to ignore their surroundings and go about their daily business but still will give strange stares. Once a novelty now becoming annoying. A feeling friends of different colors described to me but only now I understand....a little.



I want a group hug from Grace and Dawn.....and now one more... Olivia too. I miss seeing Grace's messy hair in the morning and being chided by her for telling her not to tease the boys and hearing her shout I love you as I pass through the laundry room.

Dawn seems right at home, she has so much fun with Olivia. I need to keep an eye on her though, don't carry your wallet hanging out of your coat pocket, don't stop in the middle of the sidewalk...the scooters will run into you two, I've got the passports and Olivia's paperwork. She could be on Mars and not notice. This broad is a natural Mom. She has this baby dialed in after only a few days. It's remarkable to watch. Absolutely not a single thought involved in her handling "Livvie", it's all pure natural instinct. I think it is soothing to the baby, puts her at ease. "Livvie" is the luckiest baby in the world to have her, Grace and I are pretty lucky too.



Today we leave Changsha for a week in Guang Zhou



OK Meat ... get your head back into the game there's lots of baseball left to play.



Like I said........ I don't expect this to make sense to anyone, even me.

Silk and Pagodas

Today we visited Hunan University. It is 1000 years old, we toured some of the campus. Olivia is getting more used to us all the time. She sleeps through the night. Great for now but will put her upside down on Colorado time, that should be fun.















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The symbol in this picture is the Chinese symbol for good luck, As the story goes if you put your back to the symbol, close your eyes, take three steps, turn around three times and reach for the spot where our hands are and you hit it you will have good luck. Either that or the tour guide was just screwing with us to see what he could get some silly foreigners to do.













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We visited a state run silk factory, notice the banner.(dbl click to enlarge) These women are working near windows without any lights on and are producing woven silk pictures so fine that it looks like a photograph.




We had lunch at a famous restaurant on the river. I would post a picture of the river but you can barely see it through the awful smog. Visibility is not reported in miles here, it's reported in blocks. Today's visibility is 2-3 blocks.

Olivia and I are in front of a statue of Confucius. Confucius say "Man who have Hunan baby daughter and American daughter need to sell lots of insurance to afford them."



We did a little shopping. I thought I'd let Dawn try her hand at some haggling since we will be in Italy next year. I advised her to offer $100 Yuan for the items she chose (they were asking $325). She skillfully and aggressively haggled with them. It was a bitter back and forth. I think I saw a flying elbow and heard some cursing in both Chinese and English from Dawn (we have a Mandarin phrase book, Dawn studies only the swear words). At one point with the manager in a headlock and the cashier in tears she was able to get them to relent to accepting a low low........$300 Yuan. That's right! She saved us a whopping $3.11 US. It turned out to be an expensive lesson on my part. We'll practice later on some less expensive items.

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Tonight we will go to dinner at the largest restaurant in all of Asia.











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Baby Molly

Rock Stars and Smiles

Today was a fun day for us. Olivia is beginning to get comfortable with us and spent the day smiling and giggling for us.

We visited Doa Ting Lake. It's about a three day boat cruise up the Yangtze River from Shanghai. At the pagoda we visited there were bus loads of school kids who surrounded the bus as we got off. They have never seen Americans in person before. The families on the bus were shy but as I got off the bus I raised my arms and shouted "hello". The kids cheered and shouted back "hello". Dawn dragged me off of the steps before I could get them to do the wave and chant "Go Yankees!".

Once inside the Pagoda another group of school kids flocked around Dawn and Olivia and politely asked if they could take their picture with them. They were genuinely sweet and curious, they treated us like we were rock stars. They got a big kick out of practicing their English on us. I taught one group to say "How you doin'?" and "The Mets suck". All while Dawn told the girls that boys acted like dorks in the U.S. too.

Olivia was the hit of all of the young girls once again. She began to smile and giggle while she played with this umbrella and on the bus.

We get such a kick out of her smile her whole face lights up. She likes to start to feed me a Cheerio then yank it away from my mouth and laugh about teasing me. I'm glad she's enjoying herself now. It will be fun spending the trip finding out what else makes her, and us, giggle.

Gracie, I think Olivia is going to be lots of fun but watch out for "baby alerts" since she likes to pull hair when she can get hold of it. Daisy (the dog) is sure to find her interesting. Happy Thanksgiving, Mommy and Daddy love you and miss you lots. Chris and Sue, thanks so much for having Grace, Pat and Paul over for Thanksgiving, you guys are truly family to us...we love you!

You don't see that everyday

Now after several days in China I have become accustomed to seeing things that seem unusual to me. But here are a few things that caught me off guard and I just had to throw them into the "You Just Don't See That Every Day" column.

The first one is the "Outdoor Barber".

Short on time? Need a shave? Need a haircut? Like the feel of the sun shining in your face? Why not have it all in one place, visit Shao Shen's Bistro Barber Shop. We are low on ambiance but high on sunshine. We have low overhead so we can pass the savings on to you. Come see us on the traffic island on Shoshan Lu (near the Triangle Bridge). That's right folks, look closely that's a traffic lane on the far side of our fine barber. We care about our customers at Shao Shen's and don't want you to have to make a U-turn. Come see us soon!

The next one is behind the local KFC. No frozen chickens kids, only the freshest ingredients here. Look closely at the green mesh bag, that's a 12 piece KFC bucket just waiting to happen. The guy in the tie (on the left), apparently chicken killing is a formal event, offered to sell us one of the freshly plucked victims.

The last rental car at the airport

Ever get to the rental counter at the airport and they have only one last car to rent you? Well, this is it!...... at least you get unlimited miles and it's good on gas.

My good friend Ken whined about the Dodge Nitro he got at Newark Airport when he came to visit us last May down the shore. This thing makes the Nitro seem like a Viper!

More Just for Gracie

Here are few pictures just for Grace. The first one is some of the city lights in Yueyang. In this area they have already put out Christmas decorations.

This next one is the hotel we stayed at in Yueyang. We had been riding for hours by bus all day and had not seen a single sign of western influence until we pulled in here. The nicest Holiday Inn we have ever seen. No Super Happy Welcome Guy here, just serious looking Pakistani Formal Dress Guy. We are still in southeast China, right?

And lastly, just because Grace likes horses.

The squat pot

This my dear friends and family is a squat pot. This one is in a nice Chinese Hotel. (thankfully we are staying in hotels with western amenities) but while on the road in China if you need to use the facilities and can't use a urinal this is your passport to intestinal relief (do not drop your sunglasses!).....sometimes it's just good to be a guy!

Olivia's orphanage

Today we visited Olivia's orphanage in Lin Xiang ( about a 3 hour bus ride north of Changsha). I was apprehensive about what we would find there but we knew it was a necessary part of Olivia's history for us to learn and come to terms with. Probably the only opportunity we would have to see it. We are the first group of adoptive parents to be allowed to visit this orphanage. The local TV news station was on hand to film the event (yes, I can find a way to get on the local TV news even when I'm 8000 miles away from Grand Junction)

(Olivia's crib is the one under the window)

The facility is a orphanage and an elderly care facility. The building is spartan, I could see light through the boards of the door near Olivia's crib covered with scotch tape. The nannies seemed to care a great deal about the children. They were genuinely happy to see her again, but they are spread over several children in cramped, sparsely appointed rooms. There was one heater to heat 3 rooms the babies live in.

The director of the facility was kind enough to give us the ID tag that still hung above Olivia's empty crib. Dawn's heart skipped a beat when one of the nannies ( photo below) approached holding a baby pointing to Olivia saying "mae mae"(little sister). It was not a relation to Olivia, all of the girls in the orphanage are referred to as "jae jae" (big sister) or "mae mae".

I was very reluctant to photograph the place where Olivia was found with her in the frame (the white spot next to the cart of oranges). To me it was the site of a very tragic event for her. One she will spend a lifetime grappling with, no matter how good a life we give her. Taking a photo on that spot smiling with her like we were standing next to Cinderella's castle in Disneyworld somehow minimizes how big that event is in her life. Other families took photos on the spots of their daughter's abandonment with smiling faces, don't they get it? or do I have it all wrong?

As we left, the elderly folks flocked around Dawn when she started showing the pictures of Xian Xian's (Shen Shen's) new family, the nannies nicknamed Olivia that. One woman smiled and touched Olivia's face and said, "you are an American girl now".

As we left many of the residents of the neighborhood followed us down the street to the bus to see us off and wish us well. It was an experience we will never forget. It was emotionally draining, we will sleep well in Yueyang (about 90 minutes away) tonight.

As we drove out of town, with the sun setting over the hills I began to reflect on the day. I realized that we often go through our daily lives and sometimes wonder... does anything we do amount to a hill of beans? Have I made any impact on the world around me? After today I understand that we have made a very big difference in this world to one little girl. It doesn't fix all that's wrong in this world but it's a pretty good start.

(Olivia's window was the one to the right of the woman on the balcony)

Dinner in the big city

A few of us went to dinner at a local restaurant. It said Chinese and Western food on the sign.... good luck. After negotiating with half a dozen employees a young girl gets pushed to the front of the crowd who speaks some English. Success! we have ordered dinner, Mongolian beef...very spicy and good.

All of the waitresses appear to be under 20 years old and they love Olivia. Every time we turn around another one is scooping her up to to dote on her. One of them thanks Dawn for "buying" her....the word "adopt" does not translate well??

It took us about 5 minutes to explain to them that we were leaving a tip, apparently not a practice exercised everywhere.

On the way back we saw a man we thought had fallen but he was a beggar who sprawled out across the stairs so it would be difficult to pass without giving him something. Ah ha! growing up in Jersey proves useful...don't look at him and keep walking.

We spot a place that appears to be a massage parlor (wink, wink) or a brothel. With the wives with us we don't stop to investigate further.

Here are a few city pictures Gracie should enjoy, we love and miss you.